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Rev. Michelle LaGrave
February 25, 2024
First UU Church of Austin
4700 Grover Ave., Austin, TX 78756
www.austinuu.org
Did you know that Unitarian Universalism has its very own theology? It is called Affect Theology and was created by the Rev. Dr. Thandeka, a Unitarian Universalist minister and theologian. This umbrella theology is an embodied theology that when well understood and applied can help UUs of multiple theological and philosophical perspectives to lead lives of wholeness and fulfillment.
Chalice Lighting
This is the flame we hold in our hearts as we strive for justice for everyone. This is the light we shine upon systems of oppression until they are no more. This is the warmth that we share with one another as our struggle becomes our salvation.
Call to Worship
THE LONGING FOR SOMETHING MORE
by Gretchen HaleyEvery little thing that breaks your heart
Is welcome here
We”ll make a space for it
Give it its due time
and praise
for the wanting it represents
the longing for something more,
some healing hope that remains
not
yetWe promise no magic no making it all better
But offer only this circle of trust
This human community
that remembers
Though imperfectly
that sings and prays
though sometimes
awkwardlyThis gathering that loves,
though not yet enough
We’re still practicing
After all,
still learning,
still in need of help
and partners
Still becoming able
to receive
all this beauty and all these gifts
we each bringCome, let us worship together.
Affirming Our Mission
Together we nourish souls, transform lives, and do justice to build the Beloved Community.
Story for All Ages
Once upon a time, in a magical space called Howson Hall, two Unitarian Universalists sat down together. They had just come out of the worship service. Rev. Michelle had been preaching about affect thea/ology.
“Hey, Lucas, how are you? You look like you might be feeling a little down,” said Sheldon.
“Well, I guess I kind of am, said Lucas. That sermon got me thinking about my job and I’m realizing how unhappy I am with my career.”
“What do you do?” said Sheldon.
“I sell really fancy cars, like this one. I want to help people and I like seeing how happy they are when they drive away in their new car, but I don’t love what I do in the same way the other salespeople do. They get really excited talking about engine specs and trim packages, even when they’re on break. They wave their arms around a lot when they’re talking about cars. One of them accidentally smacked me in the face the other day because she was so excited about the new car model that just arrived on the lot and she didn’t even notice I was standing next to her. But I just get so stressed out with the pressure to sell. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest and my stomach doing flip flops. I think I might need a new career.”
“Mmm, said Sheldon. That might be a good thing to think about. It sounds like even though you want to help people in a fun way, your job is just stressing you out a bit too much.”
“Thanks for listening, Sheldon. I am going to think about it some more. You’re a great friend. I’m so glad we met here.”
“Me too, Lucas.”
A few weeks later, the two friends met up once again after worship. This time, out in the courtyard.
“Hey, Lucas, how’s it going? said Sheldon.”
“Well, a little better, I guess. I left my job selling cars and now I’m trying to sell houses. I have a friend, Tanisha, who is a great realtor. Their whole face lights up with excitement when they talk about their career. I thought that selling houses would be fun, plus I thought it would feel good to help people find their home sweet home.”
“But it’s not working out that way?” said Sheldon.
“No, I’ve been job shadowing Tanisha. They still love what they do, but I’m just finding it all kind of … odd. Some of these houses just creep me out. I can feel shivers going down my spine and I get goosebumps on my arms.
“Hmm, said Sheldon. I know helping others is important to you, but maybe its not people you’re meant to help.”
“What do you mean?” said Lucas
“Well, I notice you’re wearing a shirt with dogs all over it. You seem to wear that one a lot. And I noticed you only eat the vegetarian dishes at the church potlucks. Plus, you got really excited when that tiger, India, was it?, was on the loose in Houston. You said something about wishing you could volunteer at that animal sanctuary he went to. I know you love animals a lot. Maybe you could think about helping animals instead of people?”
“Thanks, Sheldon, I will do some thinking on that. You’re the best.”
And so Lucas did just that. He went home and he thought about all that Sheldon said and about how much he loves animals and how much he loves being helpful and he made a decision. Lucas went back to school and became a vet tech. Now, he works with, and helps, the animals he loves every day as well as their human parents.
A couple of months later, the two friends met up once again, this time at a pool party at Sheldon’s house.
“Lucas, I can’t believe how much happier and more relaxed you look these days,” said Sheldon.
“Yes, I am, Sheldon,” said Lucas. “That’s in part, thanks to you. I love my new career. I’m eager to go to work each morning and find out what the day will bring and I feel so fulfilled at the end of my day. I really appreciate all the listening you did and the way you helped me put things together in a deeper way. You really are a great friend.”
“So, how are things with you, Sheldon?”
Reading
Excerpted from Braver/Wiser
by Dr. Takiyah Nur AminWhen I used to work with Black Lives of Unitarian Universalism {BLUU)-doing workshops or meeting people in UU congregations-inevitably a very well-meaning white person would ask, “Who’s the Black Emerson?” or “Who’s the Black Thoreau?”
This question is wrong; icky for so many reasons. One of the tenets of white supremacy culture is the prioritization of the written word, and not understanding that if you want to discover the “evidence” of Unitarianism, Universalism, or Unitarian Universalism in the lives of Black folks, it’s not always in written essays-because historically, we’ve had different trajectories: different levels of care and resources and access that would enable us to create something like that.
If you’re seeking sacred Black “text” in our tradition, you have to examine the way our Black ancestors lived. You have to seek out the Black folks who were in Unitarian and Universalist or UU congregations, and the work that they were doing in community-whether it was suffrage, or trying to educate Black children, or their working towards social action or civil access. Our “text” is embodied in the lives of people like Frances Ellen Watkins Harper, Joseph Jordan, David Eaton, and countless others.
One of the things I love about this tradition is that our faith is covenantal and not confessional-meaning that to some degree, our tradition cares little about what you stand up and say you believe. The evidence of your Unitarian Universalism is embodied in the depth of your relationships: how do you live in relationship to self and other? {I don’t just mean human other: to the plants, to the animals, to the stars … ) The proof is in the pudding, for UUs. It’s not about what you have to say. How are you living?
Sermon
The words washed over me like the first drizzle on a parched land:
“Though you have broken your vows a thousand times;
Though you have broken your vows a thousand times;
Though you have broken your vows a thousand times … “
The rhythmic repetition of the congregation singing in unison began to settle into my body and nourish a place in my spirit I hadn’t known was thirsty. The verse continued, washing in and out like the tide, while other voices sang from above:
“Come, come, whoever you are,
wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving,
ours is no caravan of despair,
come, yet again, come.”
And …
“Though you have broken your vows a thousand times,
come, yet again, come.”
A sense of sweetness settled upon my heart and I allowed the words to soothe me. I was sitting in the pew of the UU Church of Worcester, Massachusetts, celebrating the Soulful Sundown service. The minister, the Rev. Aaron Payson, had invited us to join in singing the missing line from Rumi’s poem; the one which does not appear in our hymnal.
I think I understand why Rumi’s verse about breaking vows does not appear in our hymnal. It has to do with the tendency of Unitarian Universalism, as a whole, to avoid all things relating to sin, confession, and forgiveness, often to our own detriment. Many, and perhaps most, of us have arrived at Unitarian Universalism after coming out of another religious tradition. And all too often, we arrive here having suffered spiritual harm from a theological language of sin, confession, and forgiveness that was used to incite feelings of guilt or shame. And so, all too often, we arrive here wanting to avoid these theological terms. Yet, this self-protective action can also come at a price. We can close ourselves down, refuse to hear or try to understand what scares us, and so reject the good and beneficial which may be mixed in and amongst the harmful.
So, while we UUs tend to avoid topics like confession or brokenness or guilt or forgiveness; sometimes, though, I think we get it right. The worship leaders at the Soulful Sundown service I went to that time got it right. I needed to hear that message that night: though I have broken my vows a thousand times, as I surely have done, I still must come. I still must approach. I still must join with. I still must return, over and over and over, again. Theirs was a message proclaiming that I belong, here, in this faith community, even in my brokenness.
Theirs was a message promising that I will be seen, here, in this, my beloved Unitarian Universalist faith tradition, for all of who I am, even the less than perfect parts, and that I will be accepted not in spite of, but because of my imperfections. Theirs was a message of hope, acceptance, and strength, not one of shame or guilt, and this is a message we all need to hear. So, I’ll repeat it in slightly different words. To truly and completely affirm ourselves and each other, we must accept those feelings of brokenness; we must accept that there are parts ourselves and each other that feel out of alignment with who we understand ourselves to be and who we hope to become. We must begin by accepting our imperfection. Only from there, will we be able to seek wholeness in any truly meaningful way.
Which brings me to … UU Theology and an introduction of Thandeka. I first met the Reverend Dr. Thandeka on Star Island a UUA/UCC camp and conference center off the coast of New Hampshire, well over a decade ago. She was then a professor at one of our UU seminaries: Meadville-Lombard Theological School; and she is a Unitarian Universalist theologian. Morning after morning, just after breakfast, for an entire week, I listened to Thandeka lecture on a system of thought she termed affect theology. She traced its evolution from Friedrich Schleiermacher through George de Benneville and William Ellery Channing and up to her own refined application to contemporary Unitarian Universalism.
Affect theology is an incredibly complex system of thought, based on neurobiology, psychology, child development, anthropology, and theology. It is also an umbrella theology: a single theology that has the inherent ability to overarch or encompass all of our individual theologies and philosophies of life. Yes, all of them – whether you consider yourself to be a UU humanist, a UU Jew, a UU Buddhist, a UU Christian, a UU atheist, a UU Pagan, or a plain-old UU; there is a home for you within the umbrella of affect theology. It is a theology to which we all belong.
In hearing Thandeka speak over the course of that week, I was both fascinated intellectually and unsettled emotionally. Somehow, I felt like my body knew the truth of her words in a way I could not articulate. Her words sounded … vaguely familiar. Her words almost … haunted me. So, ever the researcher I am, once I returned from the Island, I decided to compare what I had learned about affect theology to my very recently written credo statement. It was with that reading and in that moment that I became a believer.
I became a believer. And ever since, affect theology has been formational in the way that I think theologically, in the way that I grow spiritually, and in the ways that I teach and minister. So, what is affect theology all about and how does it work? As we prepare to explore the 4 components of affect theology, let’s imagine ourselves embarking on a journey; a journey on which we search together for truth and meaning; a journey on which we encourage one another to spiritual growth; a journey toward belonging; a journey toward wholeness; a lifelong journey.
We begin this journey in the base of our brains. This is where our brains receive both external and internal sensory input. We see, hear, taste, smell, and touch. Here, we begin to be aware that our hearts are racing, that our bodies are feeling pain, that our skin is sweating, that our muscles are relaxing. To hearken back to my Soulful Sundown experience … I heard the music: a familiar melody with a new descant weaving in and out and among notes well loved; I felt the vibrations of dozens of others singing along with me; I saw candles lit and flickering in a darkened and beautiful sanctuary. Our bodily experiences are foundational in the way we understand and live out our faith lives. Affect theology is an embodied theology.
Next, and second, on our journey, we move a bit farther up our brain stems to where our emotional responses occur. First, we experienced sensory input within our bodies. Now, we experience emotions which we feel about these same sensory experiences. I felt emotions about my worship experience – not all of which were name-able, but include feelings of comfort, relief, nourishment, reassurance, and gratitude.
Next, and third, on our journey, we move even farther up our brains and into the neocortex, the most recently evolved portion of our brains, the center of thinking, reasoning, and logic. Here it is that we think about our bodily, sensory experiences and the emotions we have felt about those experiences. Here it is that we do the work of reflection and of meaning-making. I made sense of and came to an intellectual understanding of my Soulful Sundown worship experience by thinking through that experience. I thought about the contrasts between Unitarian Universalism and Sufism in the importance each religion places on making and keeping vows and what it might mean to break those same vows. I thought about the making, keeping, and breaking of vows and how that might relate to traditional Jewish and Christian theological concepts of sin, confession, and forgiveness. And I thought about the relative lack of those same traditional theological concepts within Unitarian Universalism and what that might mean for us as a faith tradition.
Finally, with the next, and fourth, step on our journey, we move to the last component of affect theology, which is our actions. That is to say, we have sensory experiences, emotions we feel about those experiences, thoughts we think about what we experience and feel, and actions which we undertake as we interact with the world, as we live our lives. I act by admitting my mistakes, apologizing, asking for forgiveness, and changing my future behavior. I act by writing and delivering this sermon. Sensory input. Emotions. Thoughts. Actions.
According to Thandeka, it is only when these four components:
- sensory input
- emotions
- thoughts
- actions
are in alignment; it is only then, that we feel whole, that we feel fulfilled. When these four components of our lives are out of alignment, when our thoughts don’t match our actions and our feelings don’t match our thoughts, we feel broken, disaffected, fragmented, disembodied.
Affect theology is a path to leading a life of healing and wholeness and of fulfillment; a journey which we can all choose to take, regardless of our individual belief systems. In some ways, it is simple to understand (sensory input, emotions, thoughts, actions, all in alignment) but it is not actually easy to do and will never be finally or fully accomplished by anyone.
And so it is, that I believe in being fully present to those who I am with, yet I sometimes find myself feeling impatient or becoming lost in thought. And so it is, that I believe in making careful, considered, and ethical choices when shopping, yet I sometimes find myself choosing the easiest or least expensive option rather than the most ethical one.
For each piece we snap into place, there are more to be sorted, as we continually put together the puzzle we call life and journey onward. That is why we need each other – to help sort the puzzle pieces, to support and encourage one another, to call each other back into alignment. Just as Lucas’ friend Sheldon did for him, and as Lucas will do for Sheldon.
Take note, that means I ask you to call me back into alignment with myself. That’s the beauty, the absolute beauty, at the center of this theology – I ask you, my atheist friend, to call me back into alignment with my panentheistic self, not your atheistic self. And you, you ask your Christian friend to call you back into alignment with your Pagan self. No one’s individual theology or philosophy need threaten or take away from another’s. I need you all to hear this, because the survival of our faith tradition depends on this: no one’s theology of philosophy of life need threaten another’s. What we need is each other. What we need is a faith community to which we can belong.
In other words, as individuals, incorporating affect theology into our understanding of ourselves as whole, or even holy, beings is certainly … hmm, adequate for living a moral and ethical life.
We can use this system of thought to see a way toward becoming more ethically consistent in the totality of our individual being. We can use this system of thought in a spiritual practice of self-examination and self-culture. But the concept of working on ourselves by ourselves is no longer enough. It never really was. We are intimately connected on the interdependent web of life. We can only truly and fully understand ourselves in relationship to others. A change in any one of us is felt by all. We are all one.
I’ll say a little more about this, using Thandeka’s own words. In writing about a need for a language of reverence, she defines the symbol of salvation within the context of affect theology in this way:
“Human salvation is thus a corporate affair. We were not conceived, born, or individuated alone. If others did not exist (including the wider world of nature and the universe) we would not be here. We could not be here. A basic eco-biological law of nature is that organisms cannot flourish without an environment that nurtures, sustains, and enhances their developmental continuity through life-affirming relationships. Our human affections are thus deeply private and utterly social. We feel the world upon us and within us. The world stirs our affections. We are a pulse of its life.”
We Unitarian Universalists have covenanted together as congregations in relationship to other congregations of Unitarian Universalists, to encourage and support one another in our mutual quests for spiritual growth, as we each engage in a free and responsible search for truth and meaning. And so, when the search for truth and meaning becomes difficult, when we find ourselves living too much in our heads, or too much in our hearts, we can remind each other of our need for balance; our need for alignment. Body, heart, mind, will, spirit, all are essential on our path to healing and wholeness.
After all, we are all disaffected, disembodied, or broken, in some way. This is the natural order of life and the result of our all-tao-human experiences. If we were not, we would be inhumanly perfect, and no one is. Thandeka reminds us: “We were not broken alone and we cannot heal alone. It takes a religious community to heal a broken souL” We need each other.
As Unitarian Universalists, we have long struggled in finding a foundation for our liberal theology. Lewis B. Fisher said back in 1921: “Universalists are often asked to tell where they stand. The only true answer to give to this question is that we do not stand at all, we move.” This captures something quintessentially true about liberal theology, that our theology lives and grows and changes. Our theology is constantly in the process of becoming. Thandeka demonstrates that with affect theology, our search for a foundation may be over.
The foundation of affect theology actually rests outside of theology, and within the field of science. Human experience is understood through the lens of neurobiology. As people of liberal faith, we are not likely to ever plant our feet in a cement-like faith, but here we can find a place to rest, a place to find the ground beneath our bodies, a place to stop our seemingly endless wandering. Here, within the warm embrace of affect theology, we can move forward together, with purpose, as we join with each other on a life-long journey of becoming and of belonging.
May it be so.
Benediction
There is a promise, inherent within affect thea/ology, that we might one day come more fully into our own; a promise reflected in this poem by Derek Walcott; a promise that life itself is, indeed, poetry.
The time will come
when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other’s welcome,and say, sit here. Eat.
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